Since the Indignant Wife is originally from Canada, we often have visitors from Canada, or who live elsewhere in the world but were born in Canada. And it always falls to me to give them a tour of the city. We drive past the baseball parks, the Biograph Theater (nothing like blood and violence to keep people’s interest), the Frank Lloyd Wright houses in Oak Park.
And of course, we take people downtown. The Sears Tower (or whatever it’s called now), Buckingham Fountain (known to people not from here as the “Married With Children” fountain since it was so prominent in the opening credits for the show). And there is the Magnificent Mile: cosmopolitan, clean (for the most part), and with lots of shopping.
When we took people down Michigan Avenue, we would also see the NBC Tower, local headquarters of the NBC television. This meant nothing to them until we explained that this was where “The Jerry Springer Show” was taped. No matter who they are, they knew who Jerry Springer is and had some knowledge of the show.
To me, Springer is like a train wreck, you know you shouldn’t be looking, but you can’t help yourself. To the few who may have missed this television landmark, it is the sleaziest of all talk shows: “guests” were brought on to talk about all types of sexual betrayal and questions of paternity.
The pattern remains the same: a man and a woman are having troubles in their relationship, and one of the parties wants to disclose the issue in front of Jerry’s yelling, whooping, live audience. Invariably, one party has been sleeping with someone else; the someone else is brought out, and fisticuffs ensue (at least until Springer’s security guards show up to separate the parties).
It was a weird landmark – something that deserved to be mentioned to the guests. They would either titter under their breaths, or laugh out loud when they found out that Illinois was not only the Land of Lincoln, it was the Home of Jerry.
Until next week. Lured by a sweetheart deal from Stamford, Connecticut, the last Springer show from Chicago tapes on Tuesday. (Stamford, Connecticut? Who tapes a television show in Stamford, Connecticut? And now they will have to bring in the genetically challenged subjects of the show from much farther away.)
This means that there’ll be no more chants of “Jerr-ree, Jerr-ree” echoing toward the lakeshore. We will be left with our own quotient of romantically confused and hyperbolically angry young people roaming the streets. Fewer tank tops and mullets. Now, when someone is running at somebody else who had once been close to them, fingers grabbing for hair, fists balled up ready to punch, the police will be called.
Bye Jerry. Won’t miss ya.

As I wrote just a few weeks ago, spring is one of the best times of the year: the weather is warming (occasionally here in Chicago); baseball has begun; and there’s the Stanley Cup Playoffs.
The best hockey players in the world (especially now that the Iron Curtain has been melted into slag) playing the game the way it should be played – tough, but no cheap stuff because no one can afford to take a stupid penalty. Every rush up the ice has the potential for something to happen.
Add to that the fact that the Blackhawks are the first team to qualify for the Conference Finals, and it is even more special. The two series against Calgary and then Vancouver showed a young, talented team growing up. Yes, they are the youngest team in the league (average age 25.6 years), but they came together behind an aging goaltender (Nikolai khabibulin returning to his Stanley Cup winning form of six years ago) and essentially without their two top guns: Patrick Kane and Jonathan Toews. The pair of twenty-nothing phenoms finally scored five goals in the seven goal explosion against Vancouver, but before that, they had not been much of a factor. It was Andrew Ladd, Brent Seabrook, Ben Eager, Dustin Byfuglien, Dave Bolland, a resurgent Brian Campbell, and Martin Havlat that stepped up and led the charge.
If THAT wasn’t enough, we have not one, not two, but THREE game sevens. Tonight, the series the NHL only dreamed of – Sidney Crosby/Evgeni Malkin led Pittsburgh Penguins face Alexander Ovechkin and the Washington Capitals. Three of the best offensive players in the league; the guys who should be the faces of the league for years to come, play in a winner-takes-all one game showdown. It not only bodes well for this series, but these two teams should be bitter rivals for a long time to come.
Then, the surprise number 1 seed in the Eastern Conference, the Boston Bruins woke up from their playoff nap the struggle back from the brink of elimination against the Carolina Hurricanes. The ‘Canes had out played, out hustled, out hit the B’s and it looked like the bruins were headed for the golf course, but they suddenly came alive beating Carolina clearly in the last two games.
And finally, the Blackhawks await the winner of the Red Wings-Ducks series. It looked like the Red Wings would easily beat the number eight seed, but tough, tight play has the two teams facing each other tomorrow night at “the Joe” (Joe Lewis Arena). As you know by the top of this site, I’m rooting for the Ducks for three reasons: first, I admire and appreciate the Red Wings, but I still hate them; second, I think we can defeat the Ducks easier than the Red Wings (not a simple task, but I think we line up better against Anaheim); and, if the Ducks win, the Hawks get home ice advantage in the Conference Finals.
One last thought – if the Red Wings and Bruins win, the NHL will have three of the “Original Six” franchises in the Final Four and guaranteeing at least one of the storied franchises in the Finals.
It’s all good.

For the first time since 1984 and only the second time since 1978, Bruce Springsteen and the E-Street Band will be playing in Chicago tonight and I won’t be there. In 1984, I was working at Comiskey Park as an Andy Frain usher at the same time that Bruce and the boys were playing Soldier Field. Since Frain had the contract to both places, resources were stretched pretty thin, and since I was more needed at the White Sox game, there I was.
I was 24 at the time, not too happy about it, but it was in the midst of “Born In The U.S.A.” fever, an album (back then before CDs) that I had long before tired of and I had become a little tired of “Bruce The Superhero.” And besides, I got a bootleg recording of the show anyway.
But this time was different. While I do have family stuff to do, there’s always family stuff I could be doing. This time, my connections crapped out, and I’m much too old to stand up for an entire show, and I’m not paying $300 for a good seat – not even for Bruce. (I could pay much less, but I don’t want to sit in the nosebleed “Bob Uecker” seats.” It should also be noted that I did pay $300 to see The Who at the Chicago House of Blues, but that was a once-in-a-lifetime show for charity before 1,200 people.)
And, I did see the band just 17 months ago, also at the United Center, and while good as always, the new songs just don’t stand up as well as the older material. Even The Rising material was better in my opinion.
But still, it’s like all of the youngsters have pushed me out of the club. You know how it feels when everyone jumps on a bandwagon that used to have you and a few others on it. I’ve had this feeling before – when Tom Watson and I were the only R.E.M. fans around; everyone complained that they couldn’t understand the lyrics. By the time the band recorded “Green” there was a line in the store the day it came out to buy it – the club has exploded and there weren’t any chairs left. The Replacements were another example. Bruce was the most obvious one. Back when he was big in the East and hardly anywhere else, he played all of the Big Ten Universities, meaning he played at McGaw Hall at Northwestern on the Darkness on the Edge of Town tour. All the people fron the East camped out to get tickets, but the rest of campus wasn’t as excited – tickets didn’t sell out immediately. I went with some people from the east, sitting on the end of the 10th row. It remains the greatest show I’ve ever witnessed – Springsteen played over 3 hours, and at the end, the band carried him off – the great rock and roll martyr. But I was just as tired as was everyone else.
That started the long term relationship – the Uptown Theater, the Rosemont Horizon (now the Allstate Arena), the United Center, Comiskey Park. This does not include the over 50 shows that I have recorded on CDs and cassettes. I must admit however, that I have avoided the shows without the E-Streeters: not the other band he assembled after breaking up the band, nor the solo tours, and I didn’t attend the “Seeger Session” shows – too folky for me.
So guys, have a good time. I’m sure it will be a great show. Hope to see you next time.

This was in the news yesterday – an internationally known Catholic priest was shown in photographs last week embracing a bathing-suit-clad woman on a Florida beach, finally admitted that they have had a two-year affair.
The Rev. Alberto Cutie (yes, it’s “Father Cutie,” make up your own jokes) said that he is in love with the woman and is considering his options: break up with her or leave the priesthood and marry her. The woman, who has not been publicly identified, wants to get married.
The church’s reaction was typical – he was removed from his duties last week at St. Francis De Sales Catholic Church in Miami Beach, Florida, and on the Radio Paz and Radio Peace networks.
Now celibacy is primary to Catholic priests, but not everywhere. There are African priests and clerics from other areas of the world that are allowed to marry. It is long past time to eliminate another relic from the Dark Ages and admit, like Protestant and other faiths, that married people can serve the Church.
But it’s been a touch few weeks for the Roman Catholic Church – President Obama delivers the convocation speech at Notre Dame this weekend, which has caused all kinds of argument between Catholics. The silly Miss California, pushed for her anti-gay marriage propaganda has kept her crown despite the controversy, the admission that the pageant paid for breast enhancement surgery, and numerous naked pictures. Now this.
I think that the church should celebrate Father Cutie in one respect – at least he has been having sex with an adult, not molesting children.

Perhaps this explains his strange behavior and homer-less April? Los Angeles Dodgers slugger Manny Ramirez tested positive for a banned performance-enhancing substance, incurring an immediate 50-game suspension from Major League Baseball.
To his credit, Ramirez is standing up and taking his punishment like a man. According to SI.com, the outfielder told baseball officials that he was uncertain he was taking a banned substance and may have had a medical reason for using the substance. However, after consulting with the Major League Baseball Players Association and his representatives, Ramirez has decided not to challenge the suspension.
Reportedly, the substance was not classified as a steroid but was clearly defined as a banned performance enhancer according to the drug agreement between baseball and its players association. Banned substances can only be taken with prior knowledge and medical clearance from baseball’s drug-program administrators. But this is no “over-the-counter” antihistamine or diet pill – ESPN is reporting that the drug in question is a women’s fertility drug – HCG (human chorionic gonadotropin) that helps the body produce testosterone.
For the Dodgers, who currently have the best record in baseball, it is unknown how this will affect the team. Ramirez will be able to return on July 3 and will lose about $7.65 million of his $25 million salary. Of course, the Dodgers play in baseball’s weakest division, and have a Hall of Fame manager in Joe Torre, so I don’t worry much about them. But in light of the new tell-all book about Alex Rodriguez and renewed scrutiny, one wonders if anyone isn’t cheating? And in a related question, since both Rodriguez and Ramirez have played for Torre, is he covering up for them, or is he “pulling a Bud Selig” and plunging his head in the sand?
Manny Ramirez is a member of the 500 home run club, which used to mean automatic induction into the Hall of Fame, but Rodriguez is also a member, and perhaps the most accused “juicer” of all leads the home run list: Barry Bonds.
As I’ve said before, I think that for every player caught, there is another player, or even 5 to 10, who cheat without being caught. And since there were no tests before 2003, and no penalties before 2004, only the players caught under the current and future collective bargaining agreements should have performance enhancement held against them in Hall of Fame balloting. Still, even under my own criteria, Manny Ramirez’s reputation, once just nutty, is not smeared and tarnished.

I know that every beauty contest has a Q&A session to show that these young women have minds along with great bodies. Most of the time, the women come off worse than if there had been no Q&A: their comments and concerns are usually superficial and incipid at best.
So, it’s a surprise to me that people have spent any time talking about the current Miss California, Carrie Prejean. She stated that she was against gay marriage, which, of course is a political nuclear war in her home state. Ms. Prejean, who reportedly comes from religious parentage, is just blandly stating what she has been indoctrinated to say by her parents and her church.
But it is funny to see that she has truly reaped the whirlwind by her comments. First, the Right Wing trumpeted her as a hero for speaking up, but then the backlash began. First, it was disclosed that Ms. Prejean had breast enhancement surgery, paid for by Miss California officials. Now, is this cheating, unless the pageant people were offering new breasts for all of the contestants (and I won’t go any further on the ethics of human mutilation and cheating).
Then, not one, but two incriminating pictures of the young woman with little or no clothes have found their way to the media. The pictures, both of which are topless, but with her chest away from the camera may force pageant officials to strip her of her crown.
Personally, I don’t care what she says – gay marriage, or civil unions, or whatever you want to call them, will be the law of the land very soon. And the closed minded bigots will wake up one day 10 years from now, and realize that their gay married neighbors are generally nice, decent people with the same wants, desires, and fears as the rest of us. And they’ll also find out that the gay couple aren’t actively recruiting for new members of their club. And at that point, knowledge will eliminate stupidity and hatred.
But, for this young woman, her dreams of being a Hollywood star are probably over. She will be considered a bigot by many in the industry; a liability by the “suits.” Maybe she will get work in religious pictures independently financed by various churches. Her 15 minutes of fame are almost over, and none too soon from my perspective.
But, the bigger question remains – why is it that so many people who try to push their morals on people have few if any morals of their own. From all of the Republican politicians trolling for gay sex; to John Edwards who can’t keep it in his pants; to this woman; we have more and more people who profess to telling others how to behave and what’s acceptable while doing things that go against the morals that they profess for others?

You came back from Vancouver and everyone thought that we had the advantage in the best-of-seven series against the banged up Canucks. But, for the third straight game in the second round of the playoffs, you guys came out flat in the first period, fell behind by 2 or 3 goals, but, unlike other games in this series and in the opening round against Calgary, you weren’t able to mount the massive comeback.
This just in, you are a good team, and, with experience, could be a great team but you aren’t the 1979 era New York Islanders or mid 1980s Edmonton Oilers. In other words, you aren’t the best team in the league; perhaps not the best team in the playoffs. So you have to win with hustle and grit, and smarts. You can’t give up the puck in your own end; you can’t afford to take stupid penalties; you can’t afford to come out of the locker room for the first period as flat as a pancake.
I still believe that you are 1-2 seasons away from being a true Stanley Cup Championship contender, but I have been happily surprised at how you played against Calgary, and since I was 1-year-old the last time the Hawks won Lord Stanley’s Cup, I will take a championship whenever it happens.
But let’s win or lose with a solid 60 minute effort on the ice. That’s really all we fans can ask of you. Pucks take funny bounces and strange turns, so we can’t expect dominance. But we demand effort and intelligence. You’ve shown that all season. Let’s finish the season the same way!

Go HAWKS!!!

Tony